This is a stickler for me. A 'toughie' if you will.
The concept is simple: you are right where you're supposed to be in your life. To embrace this concept however, is a whole other story. We're living in a world where competition is a good thing, ambition is rewarded, and where we can 'fix' anything if we just work hard enough to get there. Cool. But does the hustle have to be a constant? I'm not sure. I love to hustle just as much as the next entrepreneur. I loved it in corporate and I was good at it, until I realized I was allowing it to become the center of everything and my life, the here and now, was just passing me by...
I'm all about dreaming big, going big, and taking action. But there does come a point when you can feel that you're pushing rather than going with the flow. When you feel depleted as opposed to energized. You know the feeling, but you also know it's difficult to flip the switch. Ironically, when I started moving into going with the flow, my everyday became so much more enjoyable but the challenges I was presented with were WAY bigger.
What I'm saying is, going with your authentic flow, following what energizes you is instinctually easy, but in many ways, it's the more challenging path to take. Maybe that's why it's the road that gets less foot traffic.
We have a lot of 'shoulds' weighing on each of us. We should be at this income/relationship status/weight. We should look like X/Y/Z. We should be happy. We should upgrade to the new OS. We should eat fewer carbs and more protein. We should buy organic, get into that school, live in that neighborhood, oh and don't get me started on the car we should be driving...
I'm just going to say it, and pardon my french (which I never understood mind you, because this expletive isn't french at all): shoulds, my friends, are complete bullsh*t. We know it too. And yet, they're tricky little buggers, pulling us right back in at every chance they have with their fear tactics.
What if the way you are right now, the life you're living right now, the spot you are sitting in and reading this post in right now, is exactly where you're supposed to be? Ugh, I know, what do you have to stress about then right? What are you going to do with all of that free time/energy? Stressing is way easier, and glorified in our everyday lives mind you. Busy is cool, hell, busy is where it's at these days. Everyone in San Francisco is so busy. What they're doing, I have no idea. Probably building apps. Actually I'm kinda busy so I need to wrap up this post soon. I'm kind of a big deal, but I digress...
Ok time to take it behind closet doors:
Stop and look at your wardrobe. Sure, it may not be the wardrobe you want. You may not be lining your closet walls and shelves with the designers/labels you dream (and drool) over. But what you have right now is nothing to scoff at. What you have right now, the pile of 'meh' you're staring at and feeling 'blah' about every day is possibly someone else's pot of wardrobe gold.
Either way, this is your life, your closet situation right here and right now so I suggest, instead of fighting against it, you learn to embrace it. Yes you can have your dreams, and yes, they can be BIG, but not to the detriment of your present sense of fulfillment. So take a look at what is in your closet right now. That is what you're working with. And your body, that is the body you're working with. Learn to not just accept that, embrace that. How? I'll get into that at the end of the post with the closet challenge. It's a simple thing but a daily practice that takes discipline.
Where are you at right now? Where do you want to be? How can you bring a little inspiration into the present moment to make you feel good and get excited about it? If you're constantly focusing on what you don't have you may be seriously losing out on what is right in front of your face.
My suggestion is to try easy. Let go of your 'shoulds' for one day. Take 24 hours and remove the self-applied pressures that fall into all things regarding where you 'should' be in your life right now. Take a stay-cation, in your head, off the Island of 'Shoulds.'
There's SO much out there, sometimes right in front of your face, just waiting for you to pause from obsessing over where you 'should' be in your life long enough to look at the opportunities that lie in the present moment. You can simplify your life, and drop the 'shoulds' by starting with your closet. Look in there, take inventory of where you're at right now, and then go get a little inspiration to discover new ways to wear what you already have. That is a start.
Where to find said inspiration? Oh come on, you knew this was coming...I am always serving up 'look-spiration' posts on the site so that is one stop you can make. You can also check out my Outfit Blueprint Pin boards to discover new ways to wear what you already have.
One of my favorite things about what I do when I create 20-30 new looks using what the client already has in there is watch their faces when they say, "oh, I would have never thought of that?" That line, when I hear THAT line, I'm at home, I'm doing what I love. I see things they didn't know were already there, not because I'm the closet whisperer, although I'm kind of loving that title, but because I've changed my focus to look at what is there, not what isn't. It's a daily practice though.
Once you do switch things up, if you start to get excited again (and this is my only 'should' for you, because really, you should start to feel excited about what you're workin' with) think about that. All you did was shift your perspective on where you're already at. All that 'good stuff' is already there, just waiting for you to stop looking for greener grass elsewhere. People, you have the greenest grass right where you're at. Like, fake-grass, golf course, wheatgrass-shot green. So green. You just needed to switch your mental filter to see it...
At this point you know the drill. Take the Closet Love challenge right, about....yep, now. See how to do it by getting the download via previous posts. It's simple, yet effective.
First, you get ready in the morning and find one thing about what you see in the mirror to compliment. Anything, but you must find one thing about yourself to love. For some of you, this won't be tough. For others it could be excruciating so start small. Baby steps.
Once you get yourself all loved-up, go out into your day and find something to love about someone else. Preferably a complete stranger. But it could also be a friend you see everyday, loved one, whatever. You've got plenty of love to give so do it. Go give a drive-by compliment and make someone else smile. They'll remember it for the rest of the day, I can promise you that.
Love her shoes? Tell her. Wondering where she got the dress because you're obsessed with it? Ask. See a great smile? Tell him/her and watch it get bigger...You get the point. Go out and conquer, or hug, whichever works best.